Mili-Brand

[jackrabbit]

Scene: Russell Brand's living room.
Russell Brand: "Forsooth, corluvaduck! Who crosseth o'er the threshold of me 'umble abode? Why! 'Tis Ed Miliband, aspirant perpetuator of patriarchal corporate hegemony! Ed Miliband! Bread Killer Banned, Spread Filly Gland, Red Willy Hand, Dead Silly Brand!"
Ed Miliband: "Now, look. Let me clear about this, Russell, because I want to be clear about it. Hello, I'm pleased to meet you."
Russell Brand: "Pray be seated upon thy dinky bum-bum, young Edward. I thank thee for thine acceptance of mine gracious summons. I wouldst fain have a right good chin-wag wiv thee concernin' great matters of state. To whit, my liege: how could a Labour administration be relied upon to shift the dialectic narrative from the pre-existing bourgeois power structure to a visceral post-Nietzschean belief matrix paradigm?"
Ed Miliband: "Russell, I think that's a tremendously important question, which I'm going to answer very directly, as follows. If what you're asking me is, Would I like a nice cup of tea, then I have to say to you: yes please."
Russell Brand: "I fear, Eduardo, that thou hast a trifle misunderstood, me old china. Let me put it in plain English. Prithee, why shouldst the electorate expect you as prime minister to effect a total revolution in consciousness of a society anaesthetised into unquestioning compliance by the tacitly enforced pursuit of consumerist trinkets?"
Ed Miliband: "Now, look. Let's be very clear about this, Russell, because I think that's the right thing to do. If you're asking me, What do I think of the decor in your flat, then quite frankly, I've got to say to you: I think it's very nice."
Russell Brand: "Ed! Ed, Ted, Jed, Ned, Judge Dredd, Right Said Fred! Once more 'twould seem that thou art dodgin' me probin' queries, thou impish rapscallion! One last go. How can you ask people to vote for a Labour Party still cravenly supplicant to corporate tyranny?"
Ed Miliband: "Russell, I think you've made a very important point. Let me respond to it simply. If you're asking me, Would I care for a slice of your mother's delicious home-made lemon drizzle cake, then I've got to be honest with you: no thanks, I had dinner at home before I came out."
Russell Brand: "Zounds! 'Tis impossible to get a word of sense out of you! Honestly, Teddy me lad you'll never win this 'ere election if you can't even have a simple conversation about soi-disant hegemonic post-Barthesian neoliberalism!"
Ed Miliband: "Thanks very much, Russell! Great to be with you! And if I may say so good luck with the new album!"

Michael Deacon Daily Telegraph

[jackrabbit]

Even better was this Letter to the Editor in the same edition:

"SIR Why on earth did Ed Miliband feel the need to visit Russell Brand? This vacuous, self-obsessed millionaire from a privileged background sees himself as some kind of Seventies class warrior...and Russell Brand is nearly as bad."

Brilliant!

[alfie sherwood]

Brand is self obsessed - he's said as much himself. He's a self proclaimed narcissist.

Lots of his ideas about an egalitarian society based upon some kind of utopian collectivism are romantic but also very naive.

He is on the money though when he describes the faux democracy that we live in, the blinkered mainstream news output and the excessive power of big business and it's influence on govt policy.

For all his many faults and irritating self indulgent personality traits, I do think that he is, for the most part, well intentioned.

[Kiffa]

Even better was this Letter to the Editor in the same edition:

oh he took us one way then went the other! guffaw.