We've all seen them and subconsciously get bombarded with them every day. I've now decided it's high time we fight back, by pointing them out to the everyday CCMB user.

So to kick off, a personal 'favourite' of mine is a wanky psuedo 'ingredient' that is allegedly put into products for our own benefit.

L Casei Immunitas is a corker of a made up ingredient, and was pumped out on Danone adverts a few years ago.

Back to the modern day, and I've just been chomping on some olives from Tesco. Very nice they are too, but on the label it says 'Haldiki Olives - lovingly blended with Slow Roasted Tomatoes'

The casual observer might opine that said olives were rolled on the thighs of Aztec virgins, as they whispered sweet nothings into their pitted exteriors, before gently caressing them into a mixture of olive oil, myriad herbs and said tomatoes.

The fact of the matter is, they almost certainly got thrashed around in a huge vat in Grimsby by an alcoholic divorced bloke, who was probably smoking when he pressed the machine's 'Mix' button.

Any more, for any more?