Wanky marketing terms

[Jordi Culé]

The use of 'iconic' in describing a product as a pair of daps, flip flops or a pork pie.

Just **** off.

[Taunton Blue Genie]

Pseudo home-spun personalisation of factory products:
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[itkman]

Pseudo home-spun personalisation of factory products:
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See also "mini" versions of things. I bloody hate them, worst thing about Christmas they are.

[Taunton Blue Genie]

The term 'Designer' clothes. Even the cheapest apparel is designed by someone.

[Zenith]

When I briefly worked in the marketing departing for a company 3 years ago, I was asked to make the menus of cafes and restaurants more exciting.

The example of Ham and cheese sandwich I was given read something like "Guthrie honey roasted Neuadd Fach ham and freshly sprinkled goats cheese, served on thick wholemeal bread"

I said it just makes them sound pretentious and totally unnecessary, but for some reason all of a sudden everyone is obsessed with things that sound middle class, that actually aren't - like a ham and cheese sandwich ffs.

[Barry Shitpeas]

When I briefly worked in the marketing departing for a company 3 years ago, I was asked to make the menus of cafes and restaurants more exciting.

The example of Ham and cheese sandwich I was given read something like "Guthrie honey roasted Neuadd Fach ham and freshly sprinkled goats cheese, served on thick wholemeal bread"

I said it just makes them sound pretentious and totally unnecessary, but for some reason all of a sudden everyone is obsessed with things that sound middle class, that actually aren't - like a ham and cheese sandwich ffs.

Smashed potato.
Clear lemonade served over crushed ice accompanied with a wedge of fresh lemon.
Responsibly sourced filet of pan seared salmon.

[J R Hartley]

When professional wankers call football clubs 'projects' and when they dress football matches to be an 'event'.

I'd guillotine everyone who was guilty of saying it.

Brendan Rodgers has to be most guilty closely followed by that wanker Malky and then Mark Warburton.

Off with their heads!!!

[sneggyblubird]

Over the years 1 product has been constantly been re-invented and women constantly fall for it............SHAMPOO Feck me how many times have they fallen for this reinvented shite over the years.Mind you,some advertising techniques are to admired.You may not know that the worlds leading breakfast cereal was originally invented as a cure for excessive masturbation.Have to say you need to eat 24 boxes a day to get any benefit.Old Kellogg missed a trick there.

[Arfur Europe]

Over the years 1 product has been constantly been re-invented and women constantly fall for it............SHAMPOO Feck me how many times have they fallen for this reinvented shite over the years.Mind you,some advertising techniques are to admired.You may not know that the worlds leading breakfast cereal was originally invented as a cure for excessive masturbation.Have to say you need to eat 24 boxes a day to get any benefit.Old Kellogg missed a trick there.

Yeah, shampoo is right up there in terms of completely fabricated marketing wank. Just had a quick look on Google and found these in 12 seconds

(Oh and EVERYTHING is 'New Advanced Formula' - the original shampoos must've been absolute shite!)

* Pro V formula
* Ceramide
* 100% natural Argan oil
* Elvive UV filter
* Sulphate Free Fortifying System

Mind you, men's razors are not far behind. I'm waiting for the day when we'll see a razor with 14 blades on it, for the closest shave a man can get, or some other such bollox.

[J R Hartley]

When I briefly worked in the marketing departing for a company 3 years ago, I was asked to make the menus of cafes and restaurants more exciting.

The example of Ham and cheese sandwich I was given read something like "Guthrie honey roasted Neuadd Fach ham and freshly sprinkled goats cheese, served on thick wholemeal bread"

I said it just makes them sound pretentious and totally unnecessary, but for some reason all of a sudden everyone is obsessed with things that sound middle class, that actually aren't - like a ham and cheese sandwich ffs.

Sounds delicious. Where can I get this toastie?

[bluethrough]

7 out of 10* cat owners say that they cats prefer it


*13 people who expressed a preference surveyed

or

Hurry!!!Sale ends soon...........Yeah right

[J R Hartley]

Is it finger licking good (afternoon Mrs R)

Give it a rest you dirty old perv. You're like Benny Hill on heat. Disgusting.

[Kiffa]

"Hand cooked"

[Mrs Steve R]

Give it a rest you dirty old perv. You're like Benny Hill on heat. Disgusting.

Please spare us the faux outrage Mr





(Couldn't resist)

[life on mars]

slowly drizzled

[splott parker]

Any company with 'Solutions' after their name.........what's the f*cking question?

[BlueWales]

TRIPLE COOKED CHIPS ! JUS ! MASH !

CLASSIC ! when applied to a celeb golf tournament.

IMPACT ! USA boolux speak comes to the UK.