STEP DAUGHTERS

[xsnaggle]

I resolved the not taking rubbish dirty plates to the bin/sink by taking what was left and putting it in the culprits room. It worked

[jeepster]

good luck

I havent got any step children, got 2 girls of my own and they can be hard work at times, oldest is 15 and i know she is stressed with school and how life is ahead of her, at times i think she is my best mate, then other times i could kill her

i can only imagine how hard it is with a step child, as they will always have it over you that you are not the " real " parent

good luck

I have two step daughters 21 & 24,the eldest wanted me to give her away at her wedding a real honour,she told me i was more of a dad to her than her real one

[Penarth Blues]

My advice is to do nothing and just wait it out. The girl will be going through her own peculiar hell at the moment of not knowing who she is or what she wants, plus the pressure of crucial exams, an uncertain world of work/University and the insecurity of already having one parent leave her.

For the longer term sake of your relationship with her and her Mum, you just need to let it go until she moves out. Only then will she realise what you've both been doing for her and at that point you can start to discuss things like adults.

I'd make sure that you and your partner spend quality time together at least once a week where the girl is not present if you can - and DON'T talk about the daughter during this time.

[Feedback]

Smash her back doors in. Tell your wife about it, specifically when you're having sex.

[blue matt]

I have two step daughters 21 & 24,the eldest wanted me to give her away at her wedding a real honour,she told me i was more of a dad to her than her real one

thats great and a truly lovely thing for her to say and as you said such a honour as from what i have learnt about step children is that you are always up against it with them, i guess that shows the type of guy you are and what you have done for them

[jeepster]

thats great and a truly lovely thing for her to say and as you said such a honour as from what i have learnt about step children is that you are always up against it with them, i guess that shows the type of guy you are and what you have done for them

I do have two sons from a previous marriage and i made sure they were all treated the same.And they all still interact with each other .

[Louth]

There's no explanation on what the kids have been through.

Poor me, poor me.

You aren't the most important person in this relationship.

[Louth]

There's no explanation on what the kids have been through.

Poor me, poor me.

You aren't the most important person in this relationship.

As for the 'joke' replies regarding tampons. I'd say there's s few with no kids here.

[Louth]

If you're coming to a football forum looking for advice, I'd say it says more about you than her.

[J R Hartley]

If you're coming to a football forum looking for advice, I'd say it says more about you than her.

Just ignore this prick SA. Poor wind up merchant.

[life on mars]

Anyone else on here have an absolute nightmare of a Step daughter?

I'm at my whits end and its driving me crazy ....... starting to effect my relationship BIG TIME

Yep , just let it go ,stop trying , if its a relationship via a divorce /breakdown your the easiest target .

There are the exceptions i'm sure ,but deep down its not the same relationship , and beware in some cases they can carry long term bitterness , they find it easier to adversely effect you , rather than the mum whose decision or action have resulted in a this position ,in a lot of cases you come into it innocently after the divorce .

I just treat them with a light support , not nasty , never over please ,as you will only get exploited and never win .

hey there's a 46% divorce rate you not on your own,my old boss always said take the moral high ground ,dont lash out , in the end you will win , good luck .

[Louth]

Just ignore this prick SA. Poor wind up merchant.

Why am I winding him up?

Perhaps if he sat down with her, instead of discussing the family's business on a football forum he'd get somewhere.

He looks for advice, we all have to put an arm around him and have a group hug?

Sit down with your wife and her daughter, discuss this properly.

If not, take a walk.

[Badly Ironed Shirt]

Why am I winding him up?

Perhaps if he sat down with her, instead of discussing the family's business on a football forum he'd get somewhere.

He looks for advice, we all have to put an arm around him and have a group hug?

Sit down with your wife and her daughter, discuss this properly.

If not, take a walk.

I have a step daughter, her dad ditched my wife during pregnancy.

I came into their lives when she was 11, she comes to me for advice, money and just a general chat. One of the proudest days of my life was when she started calling me dad.

The teenage years are awkward ones, and I wonder whether she is resentful towards you, or if she is just a "me me me" type of kid. There's plenty of those around, and there are plenty who are just as rude to their "blood" parents. As you say your step daughter is rude to her mother. If I were in your position, I would just try to stay out of it. Easier said than done, but I assume you have already tried talking to her, tried being nice to her, maybe even spoiling her. If what you say is right, then maybe you have done all you can? Just keep doing the right thing, and hopefully it will all pass. Good luck!

[Badly Ironed Shirt]

She is only a vile child because she is allowed to be. If you make the mother deal with it she either will or you have the ability to walk away. The more you react to her the more she will perform, because she gets a reaction.

Ideally her mother should pack her bags and tell her to either unpack them again and behave or take them with her as she leaves. If mother won't do that tell her to pack yours. see what happens!!

I promise you, you don't want to let it get to you as it appears to be. I've been there and all the misery now seems worth it now because of your relationship with the mother but you will look back on it as time wasted as you get older. Give them an ultimatum and stick with it. If you don't you will regret it later.

Lots of sense here. When the girl goes through her "apologetic" stage, is it all quickly forgiven and forgotten about? If so, then it seems like your step-daughter is being abusive. I mean, if you were doing that to your spouse (for example) then your friends would no doubt say you were in an abusive relationship.

[lazbian]

Being a step parent is a harder job than being a parent. I've got 3 step kids, none girls though, and they did in the past come very close to splitting up me & Mrs Monk. If I was you I'd would take Mrs Blue away for a weekend and try and have a sensible discussion about the girl's behaviour, ask Mrs Blue what she thinks can be done to resolve the issues. Explain to her that it hurts you to see Mrs Blue being treated so badly by her daughter, and that you need to come to some agreement on how you can both resolve the problem. It's then a contract between you both to try and get her to act like an adult. Don't forget, whilst you might feel it is Mrs Blue's responsibility to resolve the issue, she needs your strength to do so. You knew when you hooked up that there was a 3rd person in the relationship, so it's a joint venture getting the problem resolved.








Other than that, sling the bitch out on the street.

is her surname blue? if not, dont take someone else out, itll only make it worse

[Harry Monk]

My advice is to do nothing and just wait it out. The girl will be going through her own peculiar hell at the moment of not knowing who she is or what she wants, plus the pressure of crucial exams, an uncertain world of work/University and the insecurity of already having one parent leave her.

For the longer term sake of your relationship with her and her Mum, you just need to let it go until she moves out. Only then will she realise what you've both been doing for her and at that point you can start to discuss things like adults.

I'd make sure that you and your partner spend quality time together at least once a week where the girl is not present if you can - and DON'T talk about the daughter during this time.

That could be a long wait. In 2013, the average age of a child leaving home was 27.

[life on mars]

That could be a long wait. In 2013, the average age of a child leaving home was 27.

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek

[City123]

If you're coming to a football forum looking for advice, I'd say it says more about you than her.

You come on a messageboard trying to wind strangers up on a Friday night, says more about you tbh

[City123]

That could be a long wait. In 2013, the average age of a child leaving home was 27.

Does that include kids going to uni?

[Louth]

You come on a messageboard trying to wind strangers up on a Friday night, says more about you tbh

Wind up strangers? I guess it beats putting family business on a strangers forum.

[City123]

Wind up strangers? I guess it beats putting family business on a strangers forum.

He's asking for advice, that beats trying to wind up a bunch of strangers

[Louth]

He's asking for advice, that beats trying to wind up a bunch of strangers

You said that sometime ago.

[Organ Morgan.]

This thread, like the House of Fraser one, is shite more suited to Mumsnet: https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk

This forum should be dedicated to football and football related violence only, and I am unanimous in that!

Let's have threads where we can reminisce about events from yesteryear when we put the boot in. I want to read nostalgic anecdotes concerning fractured skulls, broken ribs, drunkenness, terrified scarfers and other incidents of public disorder. I don't wish to peruse any more cobblers about getting sentimental over buying a purse for one's nan in a department store thirty fecking years ago or family feuds involving uppity step sprogs.

[Harry Monk]

Does that include kids going to uni?

As it's the average age, it probably includes all off spring.

[Maccy Blue]

As for the 'joke' replies regarding tampons. I'd say there's s few with no kids here.

Please explain - I am intrigued by that statement.