Oh what fun it is to see Everton lose away

[Organ Morgan.]

Spoke with Sludge on the blower earlier on. He was hyper. "Be back in a moment," he said on hearing my voice. Seconds later I heard the strains of Jerry Marsden singing You'll Never Walk Alone playing on the CD. "Fecking lucky Scouse b'stards," I hissed, to which he begun laughing maniacally.

He said he'd given up on the win and had mournfully filled his hot water bottle in readiness for an early night so that he wouldn't dwell on the result. Usually when Liverpool win he celebrates by hopping on one leg while slapping his head and cackling like a mad scientist who's made a discovery. Apparently, so elated was he by yesterday's last-gasp victory that he clambered upon his sideboard to perform the ritual on.

"Yes," he opined as he adopted his formal, know-it-all tone, "good triumphed over evil at Anfield as those godless Evertonian demons were cast out". "What a load of bollox," I retorted. Queen's We Are the Champions was the next song to be heard in the background to which he annoyingly sang the chorus but the next one, Jingle Bells, that he rearranged the lyrics of that really irked.

Jurgen bells, Jurgen bells
Jurgen all the way
Oh what fun it is to see Everton lose away.

Three repetitions of that nonsense was all I could endure so I hanged up before he could inflict a fourth.

[jamieccfc]