They say cook a decent meal for a woman and you are sorted

Which is great to know but cooking , like gardening , bores the crap out of me

Sod all this buying fresh veg , preparing it , shoving a joint of meat in the oven , stress of burning it

Sod all that cobblers

Buy some microwave rice , some chicken and an uncle Ben's curry cooking sauce , shove it in a pot and there you have it

None of this poncing about with peeling veg , adding herbs , preheating the oven nonsense

My signature dish is stew , beef or chicken

Onions , carrots , spuds , parsnips , swede , peas , add a vegetable oxo cube , boil for an hour , shove it in a dish , couple of slices of bread , lump of cheese , have it !

Then clean up and put on some sabbath

She's yours basically