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Thread: Male urethra endoscopy

  1. #1

    Male urethra endoscopy

    That's a real eye opener

  2. #2

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric the Half a Bee View Post
    That's a real eye opener
    That camera is hardly a "miracle of miniaturisation"

    I was expecting a little hi tech thingy.

    More like a carpenters pencil

  3. #3

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric the Half a Bee View Post
    That's a real eye opener
    Ouch.

    The day after the last Derby match at the Vetch I received ‘the swabs’ in Dewi Sant in Ponty.

    It still brings tears to my eyes thinking about it

    I spent most of the day in Angharads drinking away the woes of having pieces of plastic being shoved down the end of my knob. Pissing was uncomfortable for days.

    Worse still, I found out a week later “I was clean!” The twisted ****er who put me through it was pissed off with me for being an absolute twat. Fair enough really

  4. #4

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    It's a shocker. But even worse is when you re asked to swallow a hosepipe with a camera at the end of it. Worse again they use the same equipment for rectal examinations and all that happens is that the "hosepipe" is wiped with alcohol after use in either throat or rectal usage.

  5. #5

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by Jordi Culé View Post
    Ouch.

    The day after the last Derby match at the Vetch I received ‘the swabs’ in Dewi Sant in Ponty.

    It still brings tears to my eyes thinking about it

    I spent most of the day in Angharads drinking away the woes of having pieces of plastic being shoved down the end of my knob. Pissing was uncomfortable for days.

    Worse still, I found out a week later “I was clean!” The twisted ****er who put me through it was pissed off with me for being an absolute twat. Fair enough really
    Exactly the same happened to me. A few years ago my housemate at the time said you shold get checked up every year,all you need to do is go piss in a cup.

    I had brought a girl home the next night and decided it was a good idea, so I went the next day expecting to piss in a cup but because she'd had a piercing it looked a bit red and I ended up getting swabbed. I have never been more uncomfortable in my life.

    Worst part was I had dropped my car off for an MOT that morning so had to walk home with a throbbing bell end. 2 days later I got a text saying all clear, so it was all for nothing anyway!

  6. #6

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by Vindec View Post
    It's a shocker. But even worse is when you re asked to swallow a hosepipe with a camera at the end of it. Worse again they use the same equipment for rectal examinations and all that happens is that the "hosepipe" is wiped with alcohol after use in either throat or rectal usage.
    I've had it shoved down my throat about 10 years ago. And the endoscopy. Thought there was a funny taste.

    Turns out there was nothing wrong. Horrible gagging feeling as they try and get it past your throat. No wonder some women don't like going down.

  7. #7

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    For me, the thought of it before the test was worse than the test itself.

  8. #8

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    I had to have a procedure done a few years ago using epidural anaesthetic. Watching pictures of the surgeon pushing this camera up my willy was strange to say the least.

  9. #9

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by Former Labour leader View Post
    I had to have a procedure done a few years ago using epidural anaesthetic. Watching pictures of the surgeon pushing this camera up my willy was strange to say the least.
    I bet. Must have felt strange having someone taking photos of the surgeon pushing a camera up your knob.

  10. #10

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    I got re-targetted by an ad for an Endoscopy repair when I opened this thread !

  11. #11

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    This is not a joke: when I was a kid I thought that a local anaesthetic was sourced locally.

  12. #12

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by Veg1960 View Post
    That camera is hardly a "miracle of miniaturisation"

    I was expecting a little hi tech thingy.

    More like a carpenters pencil
    You must have a small knob, I could get a toilet brush down mine

  13. #13

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric the Half a Bee View Post
    I bet. Must have felt strange having someone taking photos of the surgeon pushing a camera up your knob.
    Flexible chimney flue liner ad for me! Close but cant imagine what it would be like having one of those inserted in your orifice.

  14. #14

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    I've had one up the ass, you know something's bad when shoving a camera up your behind is the preferable option

  15. #15

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by delmbox View Post
    I've had one up the ass, you know something's bad when shoving a camera up your behind is the preferable option
    Ditto! Tradesman's entrance for me any time.

  16. #16

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Had a cystoscopy and endoscopy. Walking like John Wayne for 24 hours with the former, farting for Wales with the latter thanks to the copious amounts of carbon dioxide administered.

    Neither a joyous experience.😂

  17. #17

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by JKB View Post
    Had a cystoscopy and endoscopy. Walking like John Wayne for 24 hours with the former, farting for Wales with the latter thanks to the copious amounts of carbon dioxide administered.

    Neither a joyous experience.😂
    "Take a deep breath" says the consultant "I'm going round the bend". Words no man, or woman should have to hear. Trouble is, I had the same consultant doing the colonoscopy for years. By pure coincidence she was also the consultant looking after my dad when he was in hospital. I made the joke of saying "we've met before....but you wont recognise me from this angle". I hope she has got a poor memory cos I'm due back next year. Wouldn't put it passed her to turn up the CO2 just to get her own back! But, oh the relief of a good fart afterwards...and no lumps!

  18. #18
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    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by IanD View Post
    "Take a deep breath" says the consultant "I'm going round the bend". Words no man, or woman should have to hear. Trouble is, I had the same consultant doing the colonoscopy for years. By pure coincidence she was also the consultant looking after my dad when he was in hospital. I made the joke of saying "we've met before....but you wont recognise me from this angle". I hope she has got a poor memory cos I'm due back next year. Wouldn't put it passed her to turn up the CO2 just to get her own back! But, oh the relief of a good fart afterwards...and no lumps!
    Far too much information, thank you!

  19. #19

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by IanD View Post
    Ditto! Tradesman's entrance for me any time.
    You should have said! We could have had it done at the same time!

  20. #20

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Competitive colonoscopies....could be a thing. In UHD, live streamed with commentary. One point per cm. of endoscope inserted. Points deducted for breathing in gas and air. First to get a biopsy sample, from furthest point reached, out and into a test tube = bonus points. Red card and disqualification for screaming "Do you xxxing work for Dyna Rod in your spare time?"

  21. #21

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by IanD View Post
    Competitive colonoscopies....could be a thing. In UHD, live streamed with commentary. One point per cm. of endoscope inserted. Points deducted for breathing in gas and air. First to get a biopsy sample, from furthest point reached, out and into a test tube = bonus points. Red card and disqualification for screaming "Do you xxxing work for Dyna Rod in your spare time?"
    I was on the waiting list at the NHS for so long they outsourced me to a private Nuffield clinic so I got a cheese sandwich with a side of crisps afterwards. Minus 10 points for sure

  22. #22

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by delmbox View Post
    I was on the waiting list at the NHS for so long they outsourced me to a private Nuffield clinic so I got a cheese sandwich with a side of crisps afterwards. Minus 10 points for sure
    Cup of tea and a digestive (if you ask nicely) on the NHS.

  23. #23

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by IanD View Post
    Cup of tea and a digestive (if you ask nicely) on the NHS.
    Minus 5

  24. #24

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Quote Originally Posted by Veg1960 View Post
    That camera is hardly a "miracle of miniaturisation"

    I was expecting a little hi tech thingy.

    More like a carpenters pencil
    You youngsters don't know you're born. When I were a lad they used a Brownie Box camera....

  25. #25

    Re: Male urethra endoscopy

    Following surgery a tube was rammed into the delicate area to enable your urine to drain into a bottle. When the nurse came to remove it she tugged on the tube to get it out which brought tears to my eyes. That was more unpleasant than major surgery.

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