Originally Posted by
Keyser Soze
You often see two schools of thought on how to live your life. Either side of my family advised both extremes as a kid:
1. “Live for today, you may not see tomorrow”.
Often this line leads to drinking, smoking, a lack of care and taking risks you don’t need to take. Far from enjoying every day, it may shorten your life through ill health or making large errors. A popular line in Irish life, it assumes a futile view of the world, and a short life, so screw all life planning.
2. “If you work hard and save hard you will make it rich”.
A very Texan way to see the world. Enough to bore a youngster into submission by removing all day to day joy. Assumes fun is put to the wayside and a rought implicit guarantee that you will be loaded by 40 if you work hard. The trouble with this is that many street cleaners, Mc Donalds workers, teachers and coal miners worked hard, but are still doing the same job later in life, living in the same modest house. You can also be a hard worker but illiterate, a poor communicator, introverted or a poor networker - and a lack of these soft skills can see you remain a hard working old fogie wondering why life wasn’t kind, and where it all went. It also fails to account that success in life means being to the top of the pyramid, and not everyone can be at the top. In fact those at the top by a definition of a pyramid, are the small narrow part. The “guarantee” is a false hope for many. It can lead to pressure and frustration with personal failure and jealousy, or a comparison with others.
MY ADVICE…
So the line I live by since 19 years of age was one given to my by an a contact from New York. He came from an Eastern European Jewish family. The system was simple. His line was:
“LIFE IS JUST A GAME OF POKER.”
Key Principles:
1. You are dealt a set of cards in life. As in poker, everyone is different, and so everyone dealt a set of cards.
2. Don’t whinge about your cards. You cannot control what you are dealt. That will only create bitterness. You can decide if they are good or bad, but complaining to the dealer won’t change it
3. Play the cards as best as you can. That is all you can do. Size up your odds and play each round
4. As in poker there are no guarantees if you play well that you win. As with poker, it is a game of probabilities. It is highly likely that good decisions or good luck will improve your hand. But bad luck, bad decisions and even good decisions that didn’t work out well can blow you out. So get good at thinking in probabilities and decision making.
As there are no guarantee of outcomes, all you can do is get to the end of the game and draw satisfaction you played your hand as best as you can. If you have done that, then you have played a good game
IMPACT ON MY LIFE
For me this was genius advice. I am in my Forties l. I have had some downs (two big ones) but more ups. But I started off broke on a council estate. Now into my forties I am a multi-mill, have navigated several companies structures for promotions, am self taught in many subject areas, have travelled to 40 or more countries, am am multi lingual and handle my own investments and trading. I don’t need to work anymore but keep doing so just because the challenge of achieving more and making my numbers bigger each year. It keeps me alive and sharp. That success doesn’t define me and doesn’t make me special, compared to an oligarch or Jeff Bezos. I enjoy a simple pint and a pasty like the next guy. But I improved my lot in life so the system worked for me.
Am I satisfied? Most days yes, but many days I regret not investing in property more or buying US tech stocks in the 2000s. I regret not taking bigger risks whenI was young. I also regret moving away too early and not being there for elderly family when I could have helped. I have ended very healthy female relationships and discarded them, and some friends, deliberately so, to achieve my goals. But my goals were defined early and I got there and beyond. I have to accept the losses I accepted along the way as the price of that. We all have regrets. But you cannot dwell on it.
Nowadays I get as much pleasure helping struggling youngster, or graduates who are high IQ (but don’t have these life skills). Only in recent weeks another youngster has benefitted by seeing life this way. It is rewarding to see others succeed. It isn’t a guarantee this way, but it is the best system I know.
Reply With Quote