Wales against New Zealand in the egg must be the most one-sided so-called sporting rivalry in any sport.

Wales lose every game against them before the start when they quake in fear as the opposition contemptuosly point their fingers and poke their tongues at them while performing the haka.

At least the England team do a little Morris Dancing routine in response. Why don't the Welsh players turn their backs to them to twerk in their direction as a way of saying feck you?

It doesn't help Wales' cause that the assembled Gareths and Dilwyns' training regime revolve around swigging Albright Bitter and scoffing Greggs' custard tarts. They are so out of shape the All Blacks don't bother taking steroids for games against them.