I sympathise. Had some Wrexham fans take me to task because of some sort of favouritism shown from the FAW towards City. It does taint my image of their club somewhat. Also had a run in with a County fan. Also had a few moments with “Cardiff City fans” (probably some of the most tense)...ranging from racist stuff, the threat of kicking my head in to having a bottle thrown in mine and my friends direction....all in Cardiff , perpetrated by fans of the club I support.
I too was born in the Miners and know of some people who , whilst being fans of the City, used to go to watch County at Somerton Park in the seventies . Maybe it’s a generational thing but I think you’ll probably find a fair number of City fans from the area you are talking about that would have been to watch County back in the day.
My farther has never felt any ill will towards NC and did watch games at Somerton. That fact, has obviously rubbed off on me.
Generally speaking, I like rivalries as it creates moments in football that are unique and emotionally it’s incomparable (Chopra, Bellamy etc). That said, other times, it can seem like more of a deficiency as opposed to something anyone should be proud of. Knowing where to draw the line is key. During a match between two rival teams, fine. A bit of friendly banter, ok. Anything more than that and it’s just irrational.