Retirement like to see your opinions

My basic start point is this. I’ve worked continuously for 47 years, I basically know no other way of life, as in work keeps me engaged mentally & with daily challenges.

My employer has asked me to defer my retirement & offered an extended 2 year deal on extremely good terms.

So that’s the easy option for me.

On the other hand, my physical health is deteriorating and I owe it too myself & family to get some non-work time after all of these years.

If I’m totally honest I find retirement scary, to make the transition from responsibility & mental challenge to nothing.

How have others found this transition?

You can’t buy time Des.

As an IFA specialising in retirement planning and advice I can assure you that you're not alone in feeling like this.

Having something to 'retire to' is as important as having something to 'retire from. Many people struggle emotionally with the loss of status and moving from 'I'm Des ... the XYX' to 'I'm Des, I'm retired' - society has a way of making us feel that being retired we have nothing to contribute.

A great option for many which works really well is reducing hours, not sure if it's an option for you, but it gives people a chance to build their identity outside work, which still keeping the routine and status. I personally love the idea of a 3 day week as it seems the ideal tipping point of a non-work week being longer than a working week ... imagine that Friday feeling every third day!

I run retirement courses for university staff, with a big part of this focusing on the emotional aspect.

A good strategy is to plan your ideal week, and what it will consist of; there are loads of options from voluntary work, family, travelling, DIY ... it's a cliche, but if I had a pound for each time I hear 'I don't know how I managed to fit in time to work' then I'd have lots of pounds!!

I've actually built a 'Retirement Scorecard' that you may find helpful. It's a tool which people tell us helps clarify their thinking around retirement and how ready they are, financially and emotionally - it 'scores' you in several aspects of planning for retirement and you receive a personalised report which will have a series of specific tips and actions based on your score in each area.

Feel free to take a look ... it should take a few minutes and we've had great feedback since launching it for our pre-retirement courses earlier this year...

https://confidentretirement.scoreapp.com

Im still 20 years away from retirement , though to be honest I am currently pleased with that, If lockdown taught me anything It was how boring life is without a purpose, yes I could take up a hobby, but the routine of going to work is ok, yes I am lucky, I work for myself, I earn a fairly decently, I can come and go as I like, if I want to work a 12 hour day or a 3 hour day, I can

I see it all the time, customers of mine, they tell me " Matt I retire in 5 years " then they count-down to it, how many weeks or days, then they retire with great plans, take up golf, take up gardening, country walks, I see it all the time, guess what a good % do, they take it easy for the 1st 3 / 6 months, after all they have worked 40 - 50 years, so why not take a break, then they age, they age fast, it is like they have stopped working and then old age hits them, they then feel old, so they dont have the enthusiasm to golf / gardening / country walks, then they age some more, then they sit around waiting to die

I often think, I wonder what they would have been like if they had kept working

I started a thread on here about my retirement that took place about 6 weeks ago and I mentioned various thoughts and apprehensions I had about it.
I was fortunate in having dropped down to part-time 4 years ago and substituted walks in the countryside, additional language classes and other activities when that happened and I've added more of the same and domestic travel to see friends into the mix.
I haven't looked back for a second and in the last 5 days I walked 4 stretches of the SW Coastal Path in Cornwall, attended a gig in Exeter, visited a friend in Devon and walked in N Somerset today and helped a friend improve her Spanish this evening. Advanced German class tomorrow, up to Cardiff to see City on Wednesday, visiting a friend in Devon on Thursday and probably watching Yeovil on Saturday and heading for a campsite thereafter to do a walk in Dorset on Sunday.
Life is finite and I'm cramming it all in before the Grim Reaper shows up.

My current retirement plan is to die in the future climate/water wars.

You've got a family, if you can afford it retire and spend some time with them. Get a dog, go walking every day go to all cardiff home and away games, seems a no brainer to me.

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Originally Posted by Des Parrot

If I’m totally honest I find retirement scary, to make the transition from responsibility & mental challenge to nothing.

How have others found this transition?

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Retirement doesn't have to mean swapping responsibility and mental challenge for nothing.

Nor to vegetate, watch day-time TV, and die like Blue Matt's customers.

There are plenty of opportunities for responsibility - political or community activism, volunteering, and caring for family or friends. I know lots of retirees with more responsibility now than when they worked - mainly through charity work and community projects.

It is also a chance to read, listen and watch all those things you missed when you were working.

I early retired over 7 years ago and spend a lot of my time walking in the Pennines, on UK national trails (well over 1000 miles so far) and exploring this country and beyond. My knees are in a worse state than when i retired but otherwise I'm fitter.

It should be an opportunity, not a threat. Seize the day!

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Originally Posted by jon1959

Nor to vegetate, watch day-time TV, and die like Blue Matt's customers.

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Oh I didn't mean it to sound like all my customers do that, but It does happen and it happens too many times

At some point earlier this year I decided to sell my business. The one I had built up for the last 30 years or so .
I had lost my mojo , my drive . Wasnt that long ago I was getting up at 4.00 am to drive one of my trucks and
running the business from the cab . But that has gone.
What changed ? I dunno but I simply couldn't do it anymore.
After a lot of heart searching I decided selling the business would give me a fair bit of money
I didn't really need the money .
I gave a couple of key members of staff shares and took a step back .
I still have an income , the car , the phone all the perks that go with the job.
I basically run my company from the phone or go in when I want to and deal with the stuff I need to.
So I am still Jimmy from (my company name ) But I spent today walking over Aberystwyth way , as I did Sunday and Friday .
I am determined to keep my health , I have joined Bfit gym for over 40,s .
I want to travel , far and wide, for long periods , the only way to do that is be healthy . But that is my truth.
Yours could be different .
If you love your job , still love getting up in the morning and going to work there , why not do another 2 years .
If you have plans and your health is deteriorating then prioritise . Are your plans more important than your job?
If you weren't working would you be able to improve your health?

There is lots of good advice from Resign Carl above. I have seen people fall apart when they left their jobs , their jobs were part of them, a massive part of them , maybe mine is part of me so drove me to continue at my own pace .
Part time would be a good way of finding out if you actually are ready to quit.
I have seen healthy active people go to seed . Just stop . That isnt good either.

You need a VW T4 to fill that space in your life, and luckily .......:hehe:

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Originally Posted by Taunton Blue Genie

I started a thread on here about my retirement that took place about 6 weeks ago and I mentioned various thoughts and apprehensions I had about it.
I was fortunate in having dropped down to part-time 4 years ago and substituted walks in the countryside, additional language classes and other activities when that happened and I've added more of the same and domestic travel to see friends into the mix.
I haven't looked back for a second and in the last 5 days I walked 4 stretches of the SW Coastal Path in Cornwall, attended a gig in Exeter, visited a friend in Devon and walked in N Somerset today and helped a friend improve her Spanish this evening. Advanced German class tomorrow, up to Cardiff to see City on Wednesday, visiting a friend in Devon on Thursday and probably watching Yeovil on Saturday and heading for a campsite thereafter to do a walk in Dorset on Sunday.
Life is finite and I'm cramming it all in before the Grim Reaper shows up.

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Really pleased that retirement's working out well :thumbup:

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Originally Posted by Taunton Blue Genie

I started a thread on here about my retirement that took place about 6 weeks ago and I mentioned various thoughts and apprehensions I had about it.
I was fortunate in having dropped down to part-time 4 years ago and substituted walks in the countryside, additional language classes and other activities when that happened and I've added more of the same and domestic travel to see friends into the mix.
I haven't looked back for a second and in the last 5 days I walked 4 stretches of the SW Coastal Path in Cornwall, attended a gig in Exeter, visited a friend in Devon and walked in N Somerset today and helped a friend improve her Spanish this evening. Advanced German class tomorrow, up to Cardiff to see City on Wednesday, visiting a friend in Devon on Thursday and probably watching Yeovil on Saturday and heading for a campsite thereafter to do a walk in Dorset on Sunday.
Life is finite and I'm cramming it all in before the Grim Reaper shows up.

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Was it only 6 weeks ago?
That feels like a lifetime ago ..

Thanks so far. Keep em coming. I had stepped down to 4 days a week but this assignment in Poland now has me back at 6 days but I’m loving every minute & it’s taken me back several decades to my prime game. I can see elements in each reply, blue Matt’s reply is closest to where I am mentally but the flip is TBGs response. I know only I can make the decision but it’s great to know other people’s experiences. I’ve got a dog by the way, a manic Spanner.

Stay in work is my advice.

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Originally Posted by Re-sign Carl Dale

As an IFA specialising in retirement planning and advice I can assure you that you're not alone in feeling like this.

Having something to 'retire to' is as important as having something to 'retire from. Many people struggle emotionally with the loss of status and moving from 'I'm Des ... the XYX' to 'I'm Des, I'm retired' - society has a way of making us feel that being retired we have nothing to contribute.

A great option for many which works really well is reducing hours, not sure if it's an option for you, but it gives people a chance to build their identity outside work, which still keeping the routine and status. I personally love the idea of a 3 day week as it seems the ideal tipping point of a non-work week being longer than a working week ... imagine that Friday feeling every third day!

I run retirement courses for university staff, with a big part of this focusing on the emotional aspect.

A good strategy is to plan your ideal week, and what it will consist of; there are loads of options from voluntary work, family, travelling, DIY ... it's a cliche, but if I had a pound for each time I hear 'I don't know how I managed to fit in time to work' then I'd have lots of pounds!!

I've actually built a 'Retirement Scorecard' that you may find helpful. It's a tool which people tell us helps clarify their thinking around retirement and how ready they are, financially and emotionally - it 'scores' you in several aspects of planning for retirement and you receive a personalised report which will have a series of specific tips and actions based on your score in each area.

Feel free to take a look ... it should take a few minutes and we've had great feedback since launching it for our pre-retirement courses earlier this year...

https://confidentretirement.scoreapp.com

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Cheers will defo give that a look.

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Originally Posted by Des Parrot

Thanks so far. Keep em coming. I had stepped down to 4 days a week but this assignment in Poland now has me back at 6 days but I’m loving every minute & it’s taken me back several decades to my prime game. I can see elements in each reply, blue Matt’s reply is closest to where I am mentally but the flip is TBGs response. I know only I can make the decision but it’s great to know other people’s experiences. I’ve got a dog by the way, a manic Spanner.

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If you enjoy your work, then crack on. As long as you and your partner are happy with things then it doesn't have to be complicated. Personally, the thought of being at home during the day fills me with horror.

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Originally Posted by Des Parrot

Thanks so far. Keep em coming. I had stepped down to 4 days a week but this assignment in Poland now has me back at 6 days but I’m loving every minute & it’s taken me back several decades to my prime game. I can see elements in each reply, blue Matt’s reply is closest to where I am mentally but the flip is TBGs response. I know only I can make the decision but it’s great to know other people’s experiences. I’ve got a dog by the way, a manic Spanner.

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Keep working . :thumbup:

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Originally Posted by Jimmy the Jock

Keep working . :thumbup:

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but buy a T4 for when you retire :hehe:

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Originally Posted by blue matt

but buy a T4 for when you retire :hehe:

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Exactly ..............................

I was very lucky after 47 years with Cardiff - South Glamorgan - Cardiff Councils and deciding to retire 'early' instead of going through yet another management restructure. I'd been instrumental in bringing Rally GB to Cardiff in 2000 and the event owners (International Motor Sports) asked me to join them as their man in Wales - a role that lasted a further 10 years until the missus wanted to move to the U.S. to study.

The Wales Rally GB gig was perfect, part-time for most of the year, manage my own schedule, travel to see how other WRC rounds in Europe at least were organised. I wasn't a bit interested in motorsport but the people were good and helping deliver the event in Wales satisfying.

So I retired properly when we came to the States and can be counted firmly in the camp with those quoted above who say they 'can't believe they had time to work' before retirement'. I think for me the trick was going on that 10 years where there were commitments but in a leisurely way for 10 out of 12 months. It gave me the chance to wind-down over a long period so that the move abroad (at age 65 and the missus is younger than me) was welcomed, as the opportunity to do everything at a time and pace that suits me.

I only have to hurry now to be sure not to miss whatever sporting event in this world needs watching :wales: Did everyone see the Vikings see off the Packers yesterday with the last move of the game :thumbup:

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Originally Posted by blue matt

but buy a T4 for when you retire :hehe:

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Me and my wife have agreed to go the other way when we retire. Forget the walking and the camper van etc we've decided on taking drugs and drinking copious amounts of alcohol and some experimentation sexually, like swinging or dogging. It wont last long as it'll probably kill us both within a few years, but it beats scraping mud off me walking boots, picking up dog shit or sitting in a van as it cruises along the m5 motorway.

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Originally Posted by Tuerto

Me and my wife have agreed to go the other way when we retire. Forget the walking and the camper van etc we've decided on taking drugs and drinking copious amounts of alcohol and some experimentation sexually, like swinging or dogging. It wont last long as it'll probably kill us both within a few years, but it beats scraping mud off me walking boots, picking up dog shit or sitting in a van as it cruises along the m5 motorway.

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Thats a gimme with campers.
I am sure you could incorporate dogging with a little imagination.(photos might help , for a friend...of course.. )

No-one has factored in how quality of life can deteriorate with age.
I'm 76, there is no history of dementia or other brain problems in my family. I am fit and able to garden, cycle and walk energetically.
However, last year I had a brain scan and the consultant said he found evidence of brain degeneration which was typical in older people. It is certainly not bad enough to stop me driving for example but now that I am aware of this creeping on, there is a concern not just of dying, but of what later years will bring. I want to write another book. It will require a lot of research and work. Will I be able to finish this?
So, my suggestion is, if you can retire from a financial point of view, even before 65 (or whatever) DO IT.
You owe it to yourself and your loved ones to make the most of those golden years while you can. It isn't just dying that may be the future problem.
So now I fill my days with an enjoyable and deliberate mix of brain activity (research, writing, playing a musical instrument) and physical exertion for at least an hour a day, not to mention a full life with my family.

I bought a campervan and toured Europe spending months away at a time with my wife. That, coupled with learning a language that I was able to put to good use on my travels, was therapeutic and helped keep my brain and body active. That coupled with other travel kept me busy for a while but walking is now my main pastime. However, I've noticed that if I relax for a few days with no exercise it is difficult to get going again. So my advice is to keep active but to posters who dread retirement........................ don't. You have to retire sometime and it is better to do it while you are fit enough to enjoy yourself.

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Originally Posted by Vindec

I bought a campervan and toured Europe spending months away at a time with my wife. That, coupled with learning a language that I was able to put to good use on my travels, was therapeutic and helped keep my brain and body active. That coupled with other travel kept me busy for a while but walking is now my main pastime. However, I've noticed that if I relax for a few days with no exercise it is difficult to get going again. So my advice is to keep active but to posters who dread retirement........................ don't. You have to retire sometime and it is better to do it while you are fit enough to enjoy yourself.

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The irony is that if one doesnt have any health problems it's a golden opportunity to get fitter than when one was working.

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Originally Posted by Tuerto

If you enjoy your work, then crack on.

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Doing your job, there is no way you will be working at it in twenty years time - no way!
Yer body is already on the ropes, mush

I have an amusing schedule on days that I am not walking: I lie in bed listening to Radio 4 until 9am and tell myself that I shouldn't eat until after I have gone for a jog (which doesn't come easy to me!). It's a case of my laziness v my hunger and I tend to put off the jog until around 11am but do jobs around the house until then. Reluctantly, I eventually schlepp my less than lithe figure around the very large park behind my house in order to allow myself to partake of comestibles.

I decided to retire early and am leaving my company at the end of April aged 58. Just reached a stage where the hassle of my job is making me so miserable. Life is too short. I have reasonable pensions and my wife is nine years younger so will carry on working. We will have enough for a reasonable lifestyle. .

In retirement I walk the dog every day and also do a 5k run each day. I will do the household chores and cook the evening meal. That’s enough to keep me going.

This is a really useful thread - as was the previous one.

I've agonised for years over retiring and was adamant that last winter (my busy period) was going to be my last and I couldn't go through another one as it was affecting my health both mentally and physically.

But the summer came, things got easier, the work days shorter and I had exactly the same thoughts as posted earlier - I have a fear that on the outside I'm a driven, organised, respected, self employed (with two sub contractors) business owner of 25 years but inside I'm a lazy slob that would go to seed and argue with the Mrs, who I generally get on with as it is. I bottled it and ended up sliding into the winter, but did tweak the business a bit and gave more of my work away to one subby but still not sure it's enough.

I think ideally I could do with a 3 month career break but also think that could wreck my business.

Work to live, not live to work is the old adage and it is very true. For every person that I know that has gone downhill after retiring, there are a number more who have carried on and basically finished themselves off. As you get into your sixties and seventies your body and mind naturally ages, slows down and becomes unable to deal fully with the stresses and strains of normal working life. Whats the point of carrying on working if you don't need to ? Enjoy yourself more and find something else to do with your time. As my old mother used to say - you are a long time dead.

its not easy at first

I retired in December 2019 aged 59. My last working day was the very same day that news broke that a worrying new virus had been identified in China.....

I had very much taken to heart the advice that you should 'retire to' something than 'retire from'. For 2020 I had planned a 'trip of a lifetime' to Costa Rica, a month at language school in Hamburg, a job flying legal docs to Gibraltar every fortnight, organising a charity beer festival, Euro2020. I saw myself as having little spare time on my hands.

Then COVID struck, and all but the first two of my list just disappeared. The one constant is that I had also taken on an allotment and discovered that I really enjoyed growing things. (I know this isn't for everyone!).

I think I lost a lot of momentum as a result, and a certain lethargy has started to set in. Although I have had a couple of part-time jobs, just recently I have started missing the sense of some status which the job I retired from gave me. I've re-booked my language school for 2022 (who knows how travel to Germany will look next April!), and am looking into a OU course, but I still feel frustrated at times.

On balance though I'd say I made the right choice. I was reflecting on this yesterday as not working gave me the flexibility on a Monday just to take myself off in the late autumn sun and do a 6 mile walk on the South Downs. I need to remind myself sometimes as well just how much the corporate bullshit was starting to get me down. I don't miss that.

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Originally Posted by poc

its not easy at first

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It can be. I went for a coastal walk yesterday and the sun was shining on the sea where I stopped for a picnic. There was hardly anyone about and I thought about the poor souls chained to their desks in offices or to various types of equipment in workshops and factories etc. I always take some bubbly to share with the lady I walk with on Mondays and I think I am just about coping.
Three different language classes take care of some of my evenings and I enjoy the occasional quiet day when my diary is empty.

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Originally Posted by Taunton Blue Genie

It can be. I went for a coastal walk yesterday and the sun was shining on the sea where I stopped for a picnic. There was hardly anyone about and I thought about the poor souls chained to their desks in offices or to various types of equipment in workshops and factories etc. I always take some bubbly to share with the lady I walk with on Mondays and I think I am just about coping.
Three different language classes take care of some of my evenings and I enjoy the occasional quiet day when my diary is empty.

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There was no lady or bubbly on my walk. Maybe I'm doing it wrong :hehe:

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Originally Posted by Swiss Peter

There was no lady or bubbly on my walk. Maybe I'm doing it wrong :hehe:

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I never really used to walk in the countryside until about 5 years ago when I joined a walking group on Meetup. Got addicted to it, joined a swathe of other Meetup walking groups (spread throughout Somerset, Devon and Dorset) and started leading walks for many of them. The women hugely outnumber the men (most of the latter being social misfits) and, apart from the group walks (and I'm not usually a group person), I am informally contracted to walk with several ladies (individually) every week. It's a hard life but someone's got to do it.

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Originally Posted by Taunton Blue Genie

I never really used to walk in the countryside until about 5 years ago when I joined a walking group on Meetup. Got addicted to it, joined a swathe of other Meetup walking groups (spread throughout Somerset, Devon and Dorset) and started leading walks for many of them. The women hugely outnumber the men (most of the latter being social misfits) and, apart from the group walks (and I'm not usually a group person), I am informally contracted to walk with several ladies (individually) every week. It's a hard life but someone's got to do it.

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Can you direct me to one locally

Mind you from what you are saying I might doss at yours ?

Few days with the ladies , few days fishing on the Somerset levels

Everyone's a winner

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Originally Posted by SLUDGE FACTORY

Can you direct me to one locally

Mind you from what you are saying I might doss at yours ?

Few days with the ladies , few days fishing on the Somerset levels

Everyone's a winner

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You would fit nicely into the 'social misfits' category, which leaves the swathe of ladies to the few of us normal chaps.
One particular lady persuaded me to swim in the sea last week. Bloody freezing.

Walking , metal gigs , volunteering for MIND , loads of loads of fishing , visiting as many curry houses as possible , listening to metal day in day out

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Originally Posted by Taunton Blue Genie

You would fit nicely into the 'social misfits' category, which leaves the swathe of ladies to the few of us normal chaps.
One particular lady persuaded me to swim in the sea last week. Bloody freezing.

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She's clearly odd

Get rid of her

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Originally Posted by SLUDGE FACTORY

She's clearly odd

Get rid of her

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Actually, she's the most dynamic woman I know. She has wing-walked, partaken of motorbike and sidecar racing, trekked in Nepal and a multitude of other activities. I feel like a couch potato in comparison!

I retired from one job 11 years ago and now work part time, doing health and safety, fire safety 2 to 3 days a week. I have a good pension from my first job so it allows me a fair amount of flexibility. My wife can’t retire for at least 15 years so I carry on to keep the mind active. On my days off, I walk the dog, do bits and pieces around the house, go out on my push bike or motor bike and try and keep healthy until the weekends. Before Covid, we would try to go abroad once a year with family and friends and also have a break in the UK and take the dog.