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Thread: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

  1. #1

    2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Today I read with utter disgust the thread about mental health among the homeless. Enough is enough. That was shameful. On all sides. Christ knows I'm no saint but as the world in general descends into polarised views can't this message board take a stand for the better and be more tolerant in 2023? Honestly, I don't care if you disagree with me but let's keep it on an even keel. I hate that life views immediately get attributed to right/left, red/blue, tory/labour. Life is so much more nuanced than that as the thread I refer to showed. I do think that thread got out of hand entirely though. I have strong views like the next man but try to temper them these days and consider a little. I'm not great at it, and at 44 it's still very much a work in progress. But wouldn't it be great if threads were simply deleted the moment name calling starts? Aren't we all better than that?

  2. #2

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Censorship is a tough subject.

    Deleting a whole thread takes the conversation away from everybody, which isn't necessarily right, obviously.

    Likewise, censoring posters, whilst it obviously must be considered, also runs the risk of censoring and restricting too much.

    I don't envy Mike or Matt or whoever else moderates the board.

    To touch on what was said earlier about the alternative board, I think it's relatively well balanced at present although as others have commented, if you start moving too much stuff around, censoring too much etc, it runs the risk of literally destroying what is a great message board.

    Fine lines and margins!

  3. #3

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    I started the thread about the homeless and mental health at Xmas. It was meant to maybe raise awareness and possibly get a few quid to these poor sods at a time when most of us have more food and drink than we need for several weeks .

    Unfortunately some quickly turn this sort of thing into amateur social worker of the year contests and everyone who is homeless is a violent drug fuelled drunk .

    I , for my part react to this nonsense with a forked tongue instead of ignoring the bait and it all kicks off .

    As far as I am concerned the matter is closed and anyone who wants to argue can pm me as even I am getting bored .

    I think your post is excellent .

  4. #4

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Deleting threads ain’t the way to go as there’s still points that can be discussed.

    Just give out a 3 hour ban or something so the user can cool off and do some self reflecting about how silly they’re being

  5. #5

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Canton Kev View Post
    Deleting threads ain’t the way to go as there’s still points that can be discussed.

    Just give out a 3 hour ban or something so the user can cool off and do some self reflecting about how silly they’re being
    Not a bad idea that, a cooling off period.

  6. #6

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    So yes maybe a cooling off period would be more appropriate. Honestly I welcome debate from all sides and I'm as guilty as anybody about getting hotheaded. In years gone by more so, but I won't deny that I'm prone to it. Honestly though, I've voted for red, yellow and blue in my time and try to keep an open mind these days. I've worked in a job where my colleagues have been from all over GB and Ireland and also Europe. I've learnt much. But attacking each other is just shit. It helps nobody. I voted red as a youngster, liberal and more recently blue. I am not ashamed, and I am also very prepared to change my vote. I'm not entrenched in a view. I hope. I don't want to be. Same as I hated the red or dead stance over the rebrand. It wasn't so simple as that. Let's be better people next year and argue constructively. I'd like to try for what it's worth.

  7. #7

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    I think that you have shown an acceptance of your own part and apologised and I can't fault it. Tidy darts. Can't ask any more at all.

  8. #8

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Here is what I would like to do Sludge. I have given £25 to action for children as a secret santa. I have done this because for me as a child I was lucky enough to have parents who made Christmas magical. It genuinely stops me in my tracks to imagine a child without a present (I voted Tory and will do again if Starmer/Raynor remain). You tell a silly old Tory like me how to send another £25 that will have an equal effect and then let's shake virtual hands and accept that life isn't so black and white, or red and blue. Genuine offer. I'd like to help, and I'm asking for assistance in targeting the help to where it will most help.

  9. #9

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Bosch View Post
    Here is what I would like to do Sludge. I have given £25 to action for children as a secret santa. I have done this because for me as a child I was lucky enough to have parents who made Christmas magical. It genuinely stops me in my tracks to imagine a child without a present (I voted Tory and will do again if Starmer/Raynor remain). You tell a silly old Tory like me how to send another £25 that will have an equal effect and then let's shake virtual hands and accept that life isn't so black and white, or red and blue. Genuine offer. I'd like to help, and I'm asking for assistance in targeting the help to where it will most help.
    Not voting Tory would help. If you want to donate £25 to a worthy cause I'm sure you are capable of identifying one without Sludge or anyone else's help.

  10. #10

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Bosch View Post
    Here is what I would like to do Sludge. I have given £25 to action for children as a secret santa. I have done this because for me as a child I was lucky enough to have parents who made Christmas magical. It genuinely stops me in my tracks to imagine a child without a present (I voted Tory and will do again if Starmer/Raynor remain). You tell a silly old Tory like me how to send another £25 that will have an equal effect and then let's shake virtual hands and accept that life isn't so black and white, or red and blue. Genuine offer. I'd like to help, and I'm asking for assistance in targeting the help to where it will most help.
    I think you have chosen a really good charity in action for children . If you want to send more cash your local mind is a good one .....not the national mind , their top brass are on huge wages......the local minds are the ones who support many people who slip through the net with regard to getting help

    It is these local minds that do the work on the ground

    Cardiff Mind
    Mind In The Vale Of Glamorgan
    Merthyr Mind

    Those are the main ones and they should all have a donating page which means they get the money not the national mind

    In terms of voting I don't blame you for not voting for starmer I don't like him or rayner but my suggestion would be to vote liberal , Plaid, greens or independent as when it comes to looking after those less fortunate the Tories are not very good

    I have sent off a 60 quid donation to my local mind

    Nos da

  11. #11

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Bosch View Post
    Today I read with utter disgust the thread about mental health among the homeless. Enough is enough. That was shameful. On all sides. Christ knows I'm no saint but as the world in general descends into polarised views can't this message board take a stand for the better and be more tolerant in 2023? Honestly, I don't care if you disagree with me but let's keep it on an even keel. I hate that life views immediately get attributed to right/left, red/blue, tory/labour. Life is so much more nuanced than that as the thread I refer to showed. I do think that thread got out of hand entirely though. I have strong views like the next man but try to temper them these days and consider a little. I'm not great at it, and at 44 it's still very much a work in progress. But wouldn't it be great if threads were simply deleted the moment name calling starts? Aren't we all better than that?
    I just sat down for my usual breakfast scroll through the board and in particular the one about WOL. Within 4 posts it had resorted to comments about the Tory readers and Nazis. I swear if you started a post about budgerigar-keeping, the same people would find a way to get a political slants on it.

  12. #12

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    However, if someone has an opinion based on utter bollocks they deserved to be pulled up on it. An opinion that is nonsense doesn't become validated because someone wrongly believes it.

  13. #13

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Eric the Half a Bee View Post
    However, if someone has an opinion based on utter bollocks they deserved to be pulled up on it. An opinion that is nonsense doesn't become validated because someone wrongly believes it.
    Of course. If their opinion differs to yours or that which is prevailing, then they're wrong.

  14. #14

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Bosch View Post
    Today I read with utter disgust the thread about mental health among the homeless. Enough is enough. That was shameful. On all sides. Christ knows I'm no saint but as the world in general descends into polarised views can't this message board take a stand for the better and be more tolerant in 2023? Honestly, I don't care if you disagree with me but let's keep it on an even keel. I hate that life views immediately get attributed to right/left, red/blue, tory/labour. Life is so much more nuanced than that as the thread I refer to showed. I do think that thread got out of hand entirely though. I have strong views like the next man but try to temper them these days and consider a little. I'm not great at it, and at 44 it's still very much a work in progress. But wouldn't it be great if threads were simply deleted the moment name calling starts? Aren't we all better than that?
    For someone who has only been a member for a month you seem to know an awful lot about the historic squabbles on here.

  15. #15

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Bosch View Post
    I think that you have shown an acceptance of your own part and apologised and I can't fault it. Tidy darts. Can't ask any more at all.
    What part of his post was the apology?

    He can blame everyonelse as much as he likes there was only 1 person on that thread who got so personal and abusive that Mike had to delete some of his posts.

  16. #16

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by J R Hartley View Post
    What part of his post was the apology?

    He can blame everyonelse as much as he likes there was only 1 person on that thread who got so personal and abusive that Mike had to delete some of his posts.
    Ditto

  17. #17

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Harry Bosch View Post
    Today I read with utter disgust the thread about mental health among the homeless. Enough is enough. That was shameful. On all sides. Christ knows I'm no saint but as the world in general descends into polarised views can't this message board take a stand for the better and be more tolerant in 2023? Honestly, I don't care if you disagree with me but let's keep it on an even keel. I hate that life views immediately get attributed to right/left, red/blue, tory/labour. Life is so much more nuanced than that as the thread I refer to showed. I do think that thread got out of hand entirely though. I have strong views like the next man but try to temper them these days and consider a little. I'm not great at it, and at 44 it's still very much a work in progress. But wouldn't it be great if threads were simply deleted the moment name calling starts? Aren't we all better than that?
    Hmmm....too much hand-wringing for my liking. Now don't get me wrong, I luvs a group hug as much as the next totally straight but curious next man. Reads a little too much like a school lecture and the last time that happened in my life didn't end well.

    They were just tickling each other yesterday. Thought you liked a bit of old-school wrestling?

    ....anyway....f*ck the Tories.

  18. #18

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by J R Hartley View Post
    l and abusive that Mike had to delete some of his posts.
    that was me, and I was going to message you abut it, but I went out for the evening and forgot

  19. #19

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by blue matt View Post
    that was me, and I was going to message you abut it, but I went out for the evening and forgot
    I over stepped the line , some of my posts got deleted . I can accept that .

    The problem is this thread is a really positive one and it's being poked at again .

    So I would hope you are going to play with a straight bat .

    I am available to discuss anything via PM .

  20. #20

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    I'm calling this one early....*group hug*

  21. #21
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    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ninja View Post
    Not a bad idea that, a cooling off period.
    If all sludges bans for each offence were grouped together he would be banned for the next six months

  22. #22

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    I used to think I was argumentative until I discovered this message board.

  23. #23

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Citizen's Nephew View Post
    I'm calling this one early....*group hug*
    ‘Group hug?’ Hmmm, can I go for late 70s/early 80s Blondie, with me hugging Debbie? If so, much appreciated, you’re a good egg

  24. #24

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Being called a cuunt in my local is a term of affection really.

  25. #25

    Re: 2023 - does it have to be personal?

    Quote Originally Posted by splott parker View Post
    ‘Group hug?’ Hmmm, can I go for late 70s/early 80s Blondie, with me hugging Debbie? If so, much appreciated, you’re a good egg
    Great choice SP.

    70s Debbie Harry... hmmmm.

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