I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day - couldn't find any.
Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have noticed.
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One of the greatest comedians ever
You must all know loads more like this.....
I was a big surprise to my parents. They found me on the doorstep. They were expecting a bottle of milk.
I went to the doctors, told him it hurts when I lift my arm, he said well don’t do it then.
When the nurse told my mother she had an eight pound bundle of joy. She said: “Thank goodness the laundry is back.”
And one of my favourites
Doc I can’t stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home’
“That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.
‘Is it common?’
“It’s not unusual.”
But of course to paraphrase another comedian's catch phrase
It's the way he told them
And as Tommy would say
Just like that
Nof like that
Like that
I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day - couldn't find any.
Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have noticed.
Never forget that night he literally died on stage.
Shown live on Sunday night and for a few seconds thought it was part of the act.
Then it became obvious something was wrong. The rest of the show went on but he was all over the news after that he'd passed away.
What a way to go!
Extremely talented and funny man.
hardly max boyce tho
My favourite.
I was cleaning out the attic the other day.
I found an old violin and an oil painting.
I took them to a dealer and he said....
"What you have here is a picasso and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately Stradivarius couldn't paint and Picasso made awful violins."
He was delivered just like that.
His jokes written don't seem that funny, delivered live by the big man is genius.
Glass, bottle, bottle, glass Heard a story years ago told by British people on a cruise. They reckoned they had a stop in, I think
they said, Morocco and there was a local on a quayside hat stall with a fez on his head repeating ‘Just like that, just like that’. They said to him ‘Oh you know of Tommy Cooper’, he didn’t know who he was he just said that loads of people who get off the ships when passing his stall very often picked a fez up and say it.
The Plank is on talking pictures at 8.15pm tonight
I was cleaning up in the attic the other day with the wife.
Rotten dirty, covered in cobwebs....
But she's good to the kids!
Sounds like he was forever cleaning out the attic
30 days has September, April, June and November,
All the rest have 31, except February, which has 28, and 29 in a leap yr.
That’s not fair!! 😂
I saw Eric Sykes in York. The cast was brilliant and included Britt Eckland, Robin Asquith and Ian Lavender but the best performance was Sykes who was utterly brilliant. He forgot his words on a few occasions and laughed it off and had the audience in stitches. The fact he was able to perform at all was brilliant given that he was totally deaf.