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Thread: David James.

  1. #1

    David James.

    Just gone up in my opinion after he had a bit of a rant on Radio 5 about people who call any male they talk to "mate" - can't explain why and I suppose it says more about me than the person calling me his mate, but it's always made my hackles rise.

  2. #2

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by the other bob wilson View Post
    Just gone up in my opinion after he had a bit of a rant on Radio 5 about people who call any male they talk to "mate" - can't explain why and I suppose it says more about me than the person calling me his mate, but it's always made my hackles rise.
    Cheers for the heads up, I'll listen back on BBC sounds, thanks again mate

  3. #3

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by GL1Blue View Post
    Cheers for the heads up, I'll listen back on BBC sounds, thanks again mate

  4. #4
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    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by the other bob wilson View Post
    Just gone up in my opinion after he had a bit of a rant on Radio 5 about people who call any male they talk to "mate" - can't explain why and I suppose it says more about me than the person calling me his mate, but it's always made my hackles rise.
    It's better than Bro, or Fella!

  5. #5

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by North Cardiff Blue View Post
    It's better than Bro, or Fella!
    Agreed. How about butt?

    As long as people are not being offensive I don't see the problem really.

  6. #6

    Re: David James.

    Total stranger behind you whilst you're waiting to get served at the bar...

    "Can I get in there, mate"?

    They're usually already pushing past you while asking the question.
    There's often an understated threat about them—they're not friendly-looking, and they're not your 'mate'.

  7. #7

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by North Cardiff Blue View Post
    It's better than Bro, or Fella!
    Or bra…..when someone says ‘safe, bra’, I ask them is that something that’s tits don’t fall out of accidently.

  8. #8

    Re: David James.

    I find it can sound quite rude and abrupt if a moniker like mate isn’t used.

    Maybe I’m just common, but I don’t find it offensive, like when a woman calls me love or dear.

  9. #9

    Re: David James.

    Yesterday I went down a YouTube rabbit hole and was watching one of these auditors. He was near a police station so the police came over, officer every other sentence was calling this guy mate. The auditor one time says something like "but my friend I wasn't" and the officer snaps I'm not your friend.

    True story.

  10. #10
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    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by WJ99mobile View Post
    I find it can sound quite rude and abrupt if a moniker like mate isn’t used.

    Maybe I’m just common, but I don’t find it offensive, like when a woman calls me love or dear.
    In Sheffield (less so in Rotherham or Barnsley) the word 'love' is still used by men and women to men and women without any baggage - sexual or otherwise - although it is now less common than when I moved here in the early 1980s. It is just a friendly expression - and never used in an aggressive or hostile way.

    I was working on the buses and was called 'love' hundreds of times a day - by men, by women and once by a dog!

    https://www.thestar.co.uk/heritage-a...who%20we%20are!

  11. #11

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by jon1959 View Post
    In Sheffield (less so in Rotherham or Barnsley) the word 'love' is still used by men and women to men and women without any baggage - sexual or otherwise - although it is now less common than when I moved here in the early 1980s. It is just a friendly expression - and never used in an aggressive or hostile way.

    I was working on the buses and was called 'love' hundreds of times a day - by men, by women and once by a dog!

    https://www.thestar.co.uk/heritage-a...who%20we%20are!
    I've been "caught" using the word "love" and was left feeling like I'd molested someone!

    The human mind is quite capable of recognising whether somebody is being rude or offensive so what does it matter what the moniker

  12. #12

    Re: David James.

    Aight bruv!

  13. #13

    Re: David James.

    I use the phrases, Comrade, Brother of Sister. I like to keep it formal.

  14. #14

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by MacAdder View Post
    Agreed. How about butt?

    As long as people are not being offensive I don't see the problem really.
    Hmmmm...

    *strokes chin*

  15. #15

    Re: David James.

    It always struck me how much more prevalent the use of "mate" was in Cardiff when I first moved there compared to everywhere else in south Wales. It's definitely a Cardiff thing.

    When I lived in the valleys "butt" was obviously the go-to. I think "mush" probably starts off at the western fringes of the valleys and extends to Carmarthen-ish. West Wales is mostly "boy"......from my observation.

    I don't like "mate" ..... especially when said by a hard-faced cardiffian ..... I mean, you get used to it and I think I use it now that I don't even live in Wales more than ever....... sometimes to my partner when I'm exasperated or frustrated .........and she hates it too.

  16. #16

    Re: David James.

    Fella and butt are by far worse….

  17. #17

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tuerto View Post
    I use the phrases, Comrade, Brother of Sister. I like to keep it formal.
    ✊️

  18. #18

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by goats View Post
    Fella and butt are by far worse….
    I like Butt, it's a shortened version of Buttie, which just can't come across as malevolent in any way, and that's the first thing i look for (because in paranoid) Fella is awful, usually used by people who are *****.

  19. #19

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by Divine Wright View Post
    It always struck me how much more prevalent the use of "mate" was in Cardiff when I first moved there compared to everywhere else in south Wales. It's definitely a Cardiff thing.

    I think the first time I heard ‘mate’ in common conversation in Cardiff was around the early nineties and I wouldn’t be surprised if it found its way into the local dialect via English students that study and live there.

    No doubt the same tosspots that call Caroline Street ‘Chippy Alley’!

    Interloping bastards!

  20. #20

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tuerto View Post
    I like Butt, it's a shortened version of Buttie, which just can't come across as malevolent in any way, and that's the first thing i look for (because in paranoid) Fella is awful, usually used by people who are *****.
    Same here, butt is fine by me. I admit my dislike of mate is not too logical, but I just think call me by my name if it’s someone who knows me and if they don’t, it seems overly familiar.

  21. #21

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by the other bob wilson View Post
    Same here, butt is fine by me. I admit my dislike of mate is not too logical, but I just think call me by my name if it’s someone who knows me and if they don’t, it seems overly familiar.
    Yes, it's a bit unnerving, although it particularly pisses me off if it's said by someone i'm not that keen on in the first place. Amongst the younger generation of Cardiffians the common phrase is 'Bro' i don't mind it, and on estates (where i predominantly work) there is an authenticity about it, it's when i'm in Lisvane, Rhiwbina, Heath etc that it sounds really stupid, especially in a slightly plummy accent.

  22. #22

    Re: David James.

    Almost got kicked out of Wetherspoons when the manager called me ' mate' and I told him I wasn't his fecking mate.

  23. #23

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tuerto View Post
    I like Butt, it's a shortened version of Buttie, which just can't come across as malevolent in any way, and that's the first thing i look for (because in paranoid) Fella is awful, usually used by people who are *****.
    Spot on- nothing wrong with 'butt'- it's simply a Valleys equivalent of 'mate' but still with some residual sincereity. Your analysis of people using 'Fella' is is entirely correct.

    The worst I've encountered was a new landlord in my local who said 'yes friend?' when I went to the bar. I didn't go back until it had changed hands.

  24. #24

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by D. Advocaat View Post
    Spot on- nothing wrong with 'butt'- it's simply a Valleys equivalent of 'mate' but still with some residual sincereity. Your analysis of people using 'Fella' is is entirely correct.

    The worst I've encountered was a new landlord in my local who said 'yes friend?' when I went to the bar. I didn't go back until it had changed hands.
    Oh F uck, 'Yes Friend' that is shocking, i don't think that i could tolerate that either. Fella is used by over confident cretins who fancy themselves and who generally trying to sell you something you don't need.

  25. #25

    Re: David James.

    Quote Originally Posted by the other bob wilson View Post
    Just gone up in my opinion after he had a bit of a rant on Radio 5 about people who call any male they talk to "mate" - can't explain why and I suppose it says more about me than the person calling me his mate, but it's always made my hackles rise.
    I ****ing hate it . If anyone refers to me as mate (if they know me) I tell them I changed my name by deed poll as "mate" was too common.

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