🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

[uncle bob]

Phillip Schofield just approached me in the multi-storey in town and asked where the nearest toilet was.

I said, "Phillip, wee by any car“

[uncle bob]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

Man walks into a fishmonger carrying a goldfish.

"Do you do fishcakes?" he asks?

"Yes" replies the fishmonger

"Good" says the man "it's his birthday".

[uncle bob]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

What's blue and not very heavy?



Light blue.

[uncle bob]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

“I have a condition that makes me eat when I can’t sleep.
it’s called Insom-nom-nom-nom-nia!”

[Nobody's Rep]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

What do donkeys have for lunch in Blackpool
About 1/2 an hour

[life on mars]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

“Crime in multi-storey car parks."

"That is wrong on so many different levels."

[uncle bob]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

I got a Womble pepper grinder for Christmas...

It's rubbish...

Everything is either underground or overground!

[The Bloop]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

I invested my life savings in a perfume factory.
It just seemed to make scents.

[light up the darkness]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

Man absolutely hated his wife’s cat.

Determined to get rid of it One day he put the cat in the car drove 5 miles, threw the cat out and drove home.

When he got home the cat was eating some food.

Very annoyed, the next day the guy put the cat back in the car drove 10 miles threw the cat out and drove home.

When he got home the cat was sitting in his favourite chair.

Furious the next day he put the cat back in the car determined to lose the cat once and for all he drove 100 miles, threw the cat out.

Later that evening his wife answers the phone and it’s the husband. He asks “is the cat there?”
The wife says “yes he is. Why do you ask?

Husband “can you put him the phone please I’m lost and need directions”

[light up the darkness]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

I went to the zoo and there was a baguette in a cage.

I asked the keeper what it was doing there

He said it was bread in captivity

[light up the darkness]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

My wife holds grudges over the smallest things

She asked me to pass her the lip balm and by accident I gave her the super glue

It’s been weeks and she’s still not speaking to me

[ninian opinian]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

Jose Usual Self Descruct
Inherited good squad "Harry Kane ,Son and Hugo Lloris all supplement by some good players , now , same players few signings 😂

BOOM BOOM

[uncle bob]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

I recently found out my Grandfather was addicted to viagra ...

The family are all upset but no one is taking it harder then my Grandmother

[uncle bob]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

recently found out my Grandfather was addicted to viagra ...

The family are all upset but no one is taking it harder then my Grandmother

[MacAdder]

Re: 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

Man absolutely hated his wife’s cat.

Determined to get rid of it One day he put the cat in the car drove 5 miles, threw the cat out and drove home.

When he got home the cat was eating some food.

Very annoyed, the next day the guy put the cat back in the car drove 10 miles threw the cat out and drove home.

When he got home the cat was sitting in his favourite chair.

Furious the next day he put the cat back in the car determined to lose the cat once and for all he drove 100 miles, threw the cat out.

Later that evening his wife answers the phone and it’s the husband. He asks “is the cat there?”
The wife says “yes he is. Why do you ask?

Husband “can you put him the phone please I’m lost and need directions”

:hehe: